Thursday, April 05, 2007

Major Life Change #2

So sorry I haven't posted in a week or so, I am still feeling icky and I have started back to school, so much of my energy is going toward that. I have to take advantage of the few times that I feel decent to get my school work done.
I am feeling a little better, and thank you to all of you who have emailed me to wish me a speedy first trimester (it's over in 2 and half weeks!) I am still very tired and nauseated most of the time, but I have stopped throwing up everything I eat, and I am able to sleep through the night again.
In the near future you can look forward to a finished sweater, finished socks, our new P-Patch in our community garden, my (perhaps misguided) trip to the Whidbey Island Weaver's Guild Spin-In (very disappointing, but I acquired much lovely fiber!)

Now, I have alluded to a second (and perhaps a third) major life change. I have been struggling for weeks to figure out how to announce this is a diplomatic way. I have written two other complete posts, both of which were, obviously, never published. I have determined that I will just tell you all, as best I can, and hope that no feelings are hurt.

So here is my major life change (that some of the astute among you have all ready guessed.)

I am no longer working at Hillltop.

I worked there for 2 and a half years. It was the most enjoyable job I have ever had. I respect and cherish as friends many of the women that I worked with there. I am sad that I am no longer a part of that community on a daily basis.

I could leave it at that, and some might argue that I should, but my injured ego, or my consciences, or something inside of me will not allow that.

I will forgo many of the details, but I will add that I was sorely disappointed when push came to shove due to additional demands in my own life, to discover that a relationship that I thought was strong and equally yolked, in fact was not.

I went to work at Hilltop after a 6 month stint at a pharmacy in Ballard. I worked at the pharmacy, full time 9-6 M-F, for very good pay, with full benefits 100% paid for both the Duke and I, and a true pension that I didn't pay into at all. I left that job, against all reason, to seek out an opportunity to be happy, to have the flexibility I longed for to spend time with my husband, to have the energy to be creative, and to return to school.
That is just what I found at Hilltop. I gave my all to the business and to my job (as many of you know I could be a little on the annoying side at times) however, family and school were my first priorities. I was always clear about this, and for a long time there was no problem. Any reasonable employer must understand that a part time job, that offers no benefits and pays at the bottom of the pay scale, can not demand much from their employees.
However, when the industry dips, when the economy tightens, adjustments must be made, and I accepted those adjustments, as my hours continually were reduced and reduced again. However, with a further decrease in the all ready scant benefits the job offered, one would expect a proportional increase in flexibility. One (one Duchess) was wrong to expect such a thing.

When finals and a new and very difficult pregnancy (school and family) collided at once on the same day, that push came to shove, and flexibility very suddenly became rigidity. Harsh words were spoken, respect was lost.

Again, I will forgo details. Stress is a strange and powerful thing, with strange and sometimes unfortunate consequences.

As it turns out, as is nearly always the case in my life, it appears that providence had it's hand in this event. I could probably not have worked at all through the last month of my pregnancy. I am blessed that I didn't have that additional stress to deal with. Also, (foreshadowing the third major life change) the Duke has finished school once and for all. I no longer need to work (and he, being the good man that he is, has assured me that my yarn budget will not suffer. I, in turn, will be exploring new yarn frontiers, with all loyalty strings now cut.) I am also free now to focus on my own business plans, something that has previously been strictly kept to school time. Progress is being made, and I must admit that I am very happy. As the Duke often claims "It will all work out, it always does."

Smart man, that one.

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